Mother Dearest
by heytherepanda
Summary: Tamaki breaks one of the Sunday rules between him and Kyouya, but ends up entertaining the rest of the Ootoris.


**Disclaimer: I like fishies!  
Note: Just a really random oneshot I made out of pure boredom.**

It is as any other day would be. Quiet, save for some of the friendly talk between the maids. Peaceful and as serene always. It was...the Ootori household.

Every now and again, Yoshio would feel generous and have breakfast with his four children. Today happens to be one of those days. Unfortunately, this also happens to be the same day that Tamaki woke up and decided to pay his dearest friend a visit. Along with the rest of the Host Club.

Kyouya, as usual, sits beside Fuyumi and across from his elder brother, while the eldest of them all sits across from Fuyumi. Yoshio takes his usual seat and remaines at the head of the table with a news paper. The normal routine, they ate in mostly silence. Never were the Ootori's very talkative. But all the silence breaks as Tamaki bursts through the door, all but silently.

"Mooooooooooooother dearest!"

Kyouya's eyes shoot open at the name, not even having to turn around to know who it was that had entered his house. How was it that the blonde could swoon the maids into letting him in?

The rest of the family, however, were taken by surprise. Especially Yoshio. Who had this Suou child just called 'Mother dearest?' Perhaps he had heard wrong. Yes, surely he had said something else.

The teenage Host rushes over to his black haired friend and leaps, hoping to glomp the other boy. Kyouya, with his quick reflexes, easily blocks the eccentric king and holds him at bay with a hand to the boy's forehead. Kyouya glances at the door and notices Honey and Mordi standing there, watching their king. Tamaki stands straight again and smiles at the other family members, as if only now noticing their presence. He bows politely. "Good morning, sir," he says in a smooth tone. Yoshio, as well as Kyouya's siblings, are stunned. Fuyumi of course is more entertained than anything else, but it is still a surprising sight to see Tamaki go from eccentric to perfect gentleman in under two minutes.

Kyouya does not seem very amused. He gives Tamaki a light glare. "Tamaki, what are you doing here and how did you get in?"

Tamaki switched back to his eccentric and happy state. "Oh, Kyouya! It's awful! The twins are harassing our poor Haruhi! Oh, and the maids are very nice! They let me in."

Kyouya, still giving Tamaki a very unamused face, sighs. "How is this my problem?"

"How could you say that? It's incest, Kyouya! Our daughter is being sucked into those shady dopplegangers' tricks! Aren't you worried?"

"Not really."

"Well as her mother, you should be! As her father, I am worried!"

"Then _you _go take care of it."

Yoshio can't believe what he is hearing. And judging by their expressions, neither do his sons. Fuyumi however is smiling and hiding her laughter at the show before her. Yoshio blinked, more confused than he has ever been in his life. There is his youngest son, speaking to the son of Suou so freely and casually...about their _children _and _incest_.

Tamaki quickly wrapped his arms around Kyouya's neck and hung from his friend. "But Momma!" At that point, Yoshio knew he _had _heard right earlier. "I can't handle it without you! You know how the twins are, it takes a mother's touch to handle them!"

Kyouya calmly looks at Tamaki and sighs. "Tamaki, what is today?"  
"Today? Sunday, of course!"

"And what is the rule on Sunday?"

"...Don't bother Kyouya before eight...?"

"Yes. Don't bother Kyouya before eight. And what are you doing right now?"

"...Bothering Kyouya before eight."

Kyouya nods, not even looking at the blonde anymore. Tamaki is down on his knees with crocodile tears rolling down his cheeks. He leaps and hugs Kyouya's legs. "Please, Mother dear! I can't do this without you, just this once and I'll leave, I promise!" Kyouya holds his arm out and brings it into his view to glance at his watch. He sighs and stands up, grabbing Tamaki's shirt collar and tossing him from his legs. "Fine. But you leave right after that. And don't bother me unless you are dying."

"Right!" he replies cheerfully.

Yoshio, along with his sons and more than amused daughter, watched the youngest Ootori leave with two seniors and his blonde Suou friend, after a casual conversation of incest and a family.

Yoshio Ootori learned somethings important that day.

That his son's best friend was not nearly as calm as he thought.

His son was apparently the Suou heir's "wife" figure.

And that his son was the mother of five children.

The man blinked, fixed his glasses, cleared his throat, then took a sip of the hot coffee on the table. He would have to look into this later.


End file.
